The criminal

Things felt right for leaving the body. So I went to bed and breathed in the way that condenses consciousness, raises it into the crown centre and presses it against the membrane that covers the exit way. But the resistance of the membrane was strong and I grew tired. I relaxed my effort and went to sleep.

Then, as happens sometimes, I simply woke up outside the body. I had externalised through the centre at the front of the head instead of through the crown centre at the top.

I was in an unknown space. It was grey and completely featureless. A short distance away I saw four male figures standing in discussion. I recognised one of the men by his radiation as being the escort and instructor who frequently showed me around the astral planes, instructed me on technique and mechanics, and taught me conditioning of mind and soul. The other three men I recognised as being of the same organisation as he. They each had the same featureless silvery appearance, and each emitted a similar non-emotional no-nonsense radiation.

I stood at a respectable distance and waited for them to finish their discussion.

They stopped talking and the instructor approached me and said, “Your criticism is continuing to be a problem for yourself and for us”.

I said, “Yes I know; I am working on it.”

He said, “We have decided to provide you with an experience which we believe will assist you in overcoming the problem.”

“What do you have in mind?” I asked.

“We will insert you into the body of a criminal so that you know what its like to be one and so that you can see life through a criminal’s eyes. The one we have in mind has a long history of crime going back many lifetimes; there is no sin against God or man that he has not committed.”

I disliked the idea of being immersed into someone else’s body, so I said, “No, I wont do that.”

The instructor said, “On this occasion you have no choice.”

The four men immediately surrounded me, standing straight and in a square.

I went to leave but could not. I was rendered immobile by a force too strong to overcome.

My limbs and body were held rigid and I was made horizontal at chest level to the four men, who now stood two on each side of me. I seemed to be held in the grip of their minds.

Rigid and horizontal, with two men either side of me, I was transported through space.

All the way I protested as loudly and vehemently as I could. “This is against our arrangement. We agreed you will not override my freewill and I would have the choice to decline. We agreed that. This is a breach of agreement.”

I was furious at the instructor and his companions, and I exerted every effort to resist them but I was rigid and paralysed.

We arrived at an unknown destination, and then we started descending vertically.

With great effort I twisted my head to look down to where I was being lowered. I was descending into a dark room where I saw the body of a man lying on a bed.

As I was lowered into the criminal’s body I screamed with protest and exerted a massive effort to escape. With all my strength I threw myself forward to flee but I had already adhered within the body and it animated about me. As I threw myself forward the body sat up and lurched forward with me, my scream now coming out through the body’s vocal cords.

Horror and shock combined as I looked at the body I had entered and saw it was my own.

I wanted to vomit. I tried to escape out of the mouth but I could not. I felt truly awful.

Within a short while I realised the instructor had not betrayed me, for I had been due to return back to this my body, and I realised that I was the criminal the instructor had been referring to.

I got up and stayed up all night. In the morning I went to work exhausted, but with my head strangely clearer than before and a new outlook vaguely seeded.

The experience was shocking. For several nights I avoided sleep; having only short intermittent naps. I wanted to avoid leaving the body, and I especially wanted to avoid seeing the instructor. For some weeks I did not pray or meditate. Instead, I thought about the experience, and about myself. A criminal who in his long history had committed every sin against God and man.

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13 Responses to The criminal

  1. John Mondoe says:

    Would externalizing through the crown shine a different light on what you experienced?

    What critisism was the instructor referring to?

    Reading your previous segments I wondered if the instructor was a guide extension from your oversoul, but this doesn’t sound like one. Crime and sin, said the instructor/tosser, against god and mankind. Going back several lifetimes is a funny way of putting it when reincarnation is the modus operandi of the meddlers here on earth, and the origin of the “teaching”.

    A challenge for an oversoul is learning to operate the sacks of skin wrapped around the organic computers, with deliberate lousy programming. When beginning to come to terms with operating a body, a spirit extension will sit in the back seat while the body is the driver steering the wheels for the most part during that lifetime. Shit will happen when there’s minimal spirit presence. To add to the refining fires there are all kinds of influences kicking in, especially an incarnation is down. Every oversoul have lots of incarnation that can be seen frequenting Jerry Springer shows. Free will will be breeched and mangled. Advancing incarnations have greater responsibilities indeed, but I do find that there are lots of details conveniently left out by the instructor, from my POV.

    I’m not sure I will ever understand the source of everything while animating a body. Seems there are countless creators in this universe, a holding space for countless experience systems. Each galaxy seemingly has one or several creators. Could easily label them as gods, but that would add a layer neptunian fog onto them. Oversouls having completed similar adventures rings better. Yes, these are not knowns yet.

    So, breeching your free will was about you reflecting about having breeched others’ free will? It would be less twisted if a midget agreed to being tossed before the toss. Where’s the fun in that? Well, I don’t know the instructor’s intentions.

    Fire and heart

    • crossbow says:

      “What critisism was the instructor referring to?”
      As I understand it, the criticism the instructor referred to is of a type that was preventing me from seeing more of things as they are / seeing more of truth. Its not that criticism itself is bad, for critical thinking is a good thing when used properly, but at a certain type and threshold, and when used wrongly, it prevents one from expanding perception and seeing more truth. It locks one in to where one is. Particularly when the criticism lacks acceptance. Acceptance however, precedes understanding, and understanding makes criticism more realistic, of a deeper level and enables it to be more helpful. We should understand before we criticise. The experience was more about assisting me to expand consciousness of reality than about disciplining me for critical thinking per-se. It was unhelpful habitual criticism of others that was the problem at that time, not healthy critical thinking. There’s nothing wrong with criticism and criticising others, per se; but the effects of it upon ourself can be confining if our view is narrow and our understanding of what we are criticising is insufficient.

      Also, my criticism lacked heart.

      I am still critical, but recognise that it must be accompanied by acceptance and understanding; not acceptance in the often used emotional or weak sense but in a realistic mental sense. Acceptance is being able to fact things as they are, come to terms with them, understand them. Then we can criticise.

      Understanding makes forgiveness easier too.

      “So, breeching your free will was about you reflecting about having breeched others’ free will?”
      My freewill was not breeched; it only seemed to be at the time. I later realised that I was destined to return to my body, as every body does when they wake from sleep, until the day they die, and then they don’t return. I was being drawn to the body by the body’s natural pull that pulls us back to it when we wake up, but I was being drawn in a slowed down manner, the men surrounding me were not controlling me with their minds, they were just positioned as if they were, and slowing down the normally rapid automatic return. And the criminal’s body the instructor referred to was my own all along, and I have since learned that I have indeed lived a rather criminal history. When the instructor said, “On this occasion you have no choice”, he was just speaking the truth, for I was destined to go back to my body, as I am every time. So the seeming breeching of my freewill was an illusion.

      Yes your are correct; the instructor is not a guide extension of my ovesoul, nor is he a self-conjured spirit guide. (To think of a spirit guide is to create one.) It has always been a condition of my association with the instructor/escort that I not call on him in place of God / pray to him / put any sort of faith in him / treat him with no more respect or reverence than I would treat any one else, and always go through my own soul, oversoul and God. Only after I do that might he assist. That is a rule of my association with him.

      • John Mondoe says:

        Thanks for expanding. To think is to create one, but isn’t that just creating an astral thought form? Sort of like believers on earth pouring their energy into a certain faith and thus building a belief system in the astral with an astral thoughtform deity/god and surroundings.

  2. crossbow says:

    “Would externalizing through the crown shine a different light on what you experienced?”

    Yes it would have. Externalising through the crown enables one to externalise with full freewilled consciousness, with free intellect, with all mental and individual attributes and faculties intact.
    Externalising through the front of head enable high observability but less quality of freewill.
    Through the solar plexus, is dream consciousness, and is what most people have when out-of-body during sleep. It is observant and may remember some things and bring back memories to the brain when it returns. Most remember little, but the consciousness and personality vehicle (astral body) can be trained so that it will have good observance and recall in this type of leaving the body, but there is no here-now freewilled consciousness. That is not a bad or imperfect thing, in fact is necessary and often the best thing, because this form of externalising can be directed by the oversoul to provide lessons and symbolic messages, whereas to esternalise through head or crown one must consciously hand over oneself to the oversoul to be able to be directed by it, and this is difficult for most of us.

    If I had have externalised through the crown then I would probably have not been able to be given that lesson because I would have broken free of the control of oversoul and body. That is probably why I couldn’t exit via crown on that occasion, because that lesson was waiting for me.

    “To think is to create one, but isn’t that just creating an astral thought form?”

    Yes, that is correct.
    To think of a God is to create one. But that does not mean there is not a God. It just means there is a surer way to connect with God than by worshiping our own mental images. That is what is meant in the Old Testament when God commands the Jews not to construct and worship images or idols. Whether constructed in thought matter or physical matter, it is still a graven image. Graven meaning firmly fixed, in matter or in mind. Think engrave.
    God is within the thinker, not within the thought.

    • John Mondoe says:

      Externalizing through the crown, but the stream from the oversoul is still passing through the body – doesn’t that add colour, or make one unable to see the gradients as someone disconnected from a body would?

      • crossbow says:

        A thoughtful question John.
        The answer is, no. And the reason is this:

        The oversoul exists above the crown centre / conscience.
        Running between oversoul and conscience is the stream of connection / silver cord / thread / like a laser beam of light, of life and communication.
        From the oversoul it comes in to our self through crown/conscience, then down through each centre to the base centre which is between the legs.

        It is like a coaxial cable, layered, with life/consciousness centremost and will/communication outermost. The will of the oversoul is stopped at the membrane of conscience/crown centre, like light being stopped at a translucent skylight but with only a little diffused light getting through, and the life/consciousness which is the centremost part of the thread continues through the crown’s membrane, on down through the rest of the body’s centres and is the consciousness of them.
        Consciousness is multi-dimensional and is both spherical and threadlike, like a 3 dimensional staff is both round and flat in cross section, and long.

        When we externalise through the crown/conscience, we are then positioned on the cord between the body and the oversoul, so that the cord runs from the oversoul, directly to our self the externalised consciousness, and through our externalised self, then to the physical body which is below us and at the cord’s end.

        When we externalise through the solarplexus, which we do most of the time when we sleep, then we are positioned at the end of the cord, with the cord running from the oversoul, then through the body, then to our self at the cord’s end, so the body is on the cord between the oversoul and the externalised consciousness, causing it to have no freewill or free intellect, only observation and reflexive automation as in dreams.

        The contact and the contrast or the difference between the vibration of our consciousness and that of our conscience is what gives us our unique human freewilled intellect. (together with absence of programing / and the black and white prime distinction of our intelligence)
        When we leave via the solar plexus and are at the end of the cord with the body positioned on the cord between our self and the oversoul, then we have no contact with conscience and we can only observe and recall (at best), but cannot use intellect, and this is the normal sleep/dream state. (We disassemble that way during sleep to get our freewill out of the way so that energy from the oversoul can replenish the physical/vital body.)

        This all needs thorough explaining, with diagrams and clear descriptions of structure and function of all component parts. And I think is best done progressively, starting at the outside and most physical, and going progressively inward to most subtle.
        I intend to do it in the posts, so as to make clear the mechanism and its workings and operation.

      • John Mondoe says:

        There wasn’t reply button to your follow up so here it goes. On the way to the oversoul I’ve found a smaller extension of “it”. Have you encountered this? I think the location is akin to what Monroe dubbed as focus 10. Other than the oval shaped spirit, lots of other geometric shapes floating about. A way to enter the oversoul is to enter the extension.

        • crossbow says:

          There should be reply buttons now, enabling ten replies per comment.

          I cannot be sure of the extensions or the geometric shapes you refer to. Many communications from oversoul to soul are in language designed to best fit the way the soul currently understands things; so communication is often personally attuned.

          We each are like a pseudopod. We our self, that is, our own consciousness, is the extension in-through which our oversoul is contacted.

          The oversoul is that part of our self that is qualitatively identical to the Absolute/God/Truth. But our conscience can be no higher than our oversoul, and nothing is of higher standard to us than our conscience. Conscience is where its all at, so to speak. As we know no higher standard than our own conscience, our conscience knows no higher standard than our oversoul. We represent that which is above us to that below us, and visa-versa, at every stage/step of the ladder. And only to the extent that we accurately represent what is immediately above, can we know what is further above.

          We each are analogous to a hand, the wrist joint being like the conscience, connecting hand to arm, while at the same time separating them, and up the arm to the head. The hand has its own awareness and senses, and the greater awareness of the head includes the lesser awareness of the hand, so everything the hand is aware of, the head is aware of. Except that we have freewill, enabling oversoul to have simultaneous and extreme objective and subjective experience in every sense, of our life, and with all that that entails, which maximises learning and progress.

          A few landmarks/guidelines yourself and other readers might be interested in considering:

          Treat everything tentatively until it is known.
          We must discern between what we know and what we only think we know. Tighten up the distinction between what is known and what is perceived. This goes hand in hand with tightening up the distinction between our self and our surroundings. It is an ongoing process. Regularly prune back / eliminate what is unknown from what is knowledge/experience/proof; and what is not self from what is self.
          Develop precision thinking – towards specific details and the overall bigger picture.
          Discern, discern, discern; and include, include, include. Discriminate to the finest degree and incorporate to the most inclusive degree, and without limit either way. Refine and expand the mind.
          Between knowledge and information exists experiential information, which can easily be mistaken for experience and therefore knowledge. It is information which comes from within. We must learn to navigate through this field. It is potentially trapping, and no more credible than standard information. Subjecting all to our own judgement, be our judgement right or wrong, is our protection and our growth as individual souls.
          Truth requires our blind faith in its existence, commitment to its concept, and intelligent tentativeness regarding its details.

  3. Betsi M says:

    Thanks to you both for a very helpful post and discussion !

  4. Betsi M says:

    I notice that every time you speak to these entities your approach both shows respect and also affirms your understanding of what they just said. (Whereas a stream-of consciousness input of self-knowledge would seem to ‘wait for no man.’) Do you consciously perhaps before you go say to yourself that you want a respectful dialogue?

    • crossbow says:

      I don’t think I clearly understand your question Betsi.

      Do I consciously seek a respectful dialogue? No, I don’t seek a respectful dialogue. It is just as it is, due to what we are. If we define respect as recognition of each another’s standing, then yes we respect each other. But that’s as far as it goes.
      I want nothing from them; I do not seek them out. There is no emotional connection or emotional exchange between us. They are not emotional lovey-duvy caring-soothing spirit guide types. They do not assist me with personal issues; have only instructed me in general matters of occult/spiritual/life/human condition. A condition of their association with me has been that our relationship is impersonal, and incidental to my relationship with my own soul and with God. We have assisted each other incidentally to our respective causes. My cause being a search for truth and knowledge of self, and their cause being their own, of which I think best not to attempt to describe here. The escort told me about 20 years ago, “It is not for your sake that we have helped you, but for the sake of others.” I know I mean nothing to them except my relevance to their cause, and they mean the same to me. Students and agents of truth. Our respective causes, although seeming different, are like two opposing grips on either side of the same cause, so in a sense we share the same greater cause via our respective grips/lesser cause. There is a strong sense of respect and understanding between us, but it is not in anyway constructed, needy, personal or emotional, just a matter of fact, take it or leave it type of relationship – a sense of individuals cooperating, utilising and assisting each other, but not needing each other. My relationship to my own soul, to truth and love, is what is important; not my relationship to them; they are incidental to my cause, as I am incidental to theirs.

  5. Betsi M says:

    Thank you. I guess I was comparing your experiences to the more NDEncounters where many report having so much knowledge and understanding poured into them or blasted into their minds with brilliant light. I wondered how you got the relationship you have but I do see ‘the mutual recognition.’ Now I don’t understand your last remark about being incidental to each other’s causes. ‘Incident’ sounds casual, and yet they continue to seek you out. I don’t mean to be picky, rather to make sure I understand as much as possible. Thank you for explaining.

    • crossbow says:

      I expect there is a more accurate word I could have used than incidental.
      By incidental I meant both they and I have greater interests than our relationship. And our relationship is just a means towards that greater interest.
      As the escort/instructor told me, “It is not for your sake that we have helped you, but for the sake of others.”
      And as is their condition upon me of my association with them, that I do not seek them out, but always go through my own soul, and that I search for truth myself and not through them.
      If I had been otherwise, if I had shown or felt any sense of reverence towards them, or sought their assistance/help/guidance without going through my own soul, then they would not have associated with me.
      They do not encourage people towards weakness, nor towards reliance upon or worship of them, they do not risk misdirecting anyone away from their own soul.


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